D&D In Love

Even in games, there is Love

Ask any gamer if there is love on the battlefield of RPG’s and they will say yes. The first RPG video game I ever played was Xenogears back on PS1 and two of the main characters fell in love (there was even an intimate scene, which surprised the hogwallops out of me, but it was 1998 so such things weren’t quite as common as they are today).

Even when I played my first game of D&D, back in the early 90’s, just me and a bunch of guys playing 2nd edition, the characters all had NPC girlfriends and boyfriends in the game. It seemed to be something they actively sought (I say they because even though I was a lonely teen too, I didn’t want to give any of the guys the wrong idea and have them attempt to step out of the friend zone I’d put them in. I had more important things to deal with).

I’ve noticed relationships in game aren’t as important to us now as they once were, but they’re still there.

Watch your Chickens!

In our last campaign, we had a character who had a long lasting love affair with a dragon. Another still who used polymorph to have a relationship with… a chicken… I’m not going to go into that.

I played in a game many years ago where my character and another player’s character were in a relationship for whole game, though the other player and I had no romantic intentions toward each other whatsoever.

I even had a player in one of the first games I ran when I started DM-ing, who fostered a relationship with a pretty barmaid. Every time the party was in town, he would stop at that bar and take her out on dates.

In-Game Dating can be awkward for the DM

What was sweet is that the rest of the party would follow them and makes sure nothing bad happened (other than their pranks, of course).

When my player finally proposed to the barmaid, one of my other players went online and got a minister’s license just so he could marry the two in-game.

It was adorable. And perfect. Until I killed his wife and sent him on a rampaging quest for vengeance.

I gave him a choice, I really did. I asked him if he was going to hang up his sword and take an arrow to the knee to start a home life with her (aka: retire his character and roll up a new one). But he chose to keep adventuring, and adventurers make enemies.

Players, a word of warning. When creating a background or fostering relationships within game, don’t forget that a good DM will ALWAYS use your family against you to drive the story.


1 thought on “D&D In Love

  1. I enjoyed your post. I’d like to add two things I find worth mentioning. First, I’ve found that trying to conduct a romance or fling in a game can be awkward for the participants. Not just because one person might imagine there was romantic intention in “Real Life.” But a game that spirals down into bodice-ripper, or HBO level, can be difficult to dialogue. Especially when the participants in RL don’t look like the delicate little elf-maid or the Greek hero they’re supposed to be playing. If someone in a group wants to have a fling or start a romance, we tend to third-person it, summarize and have the “screen fade to black.”
    Secondly, about using family to drive a story. With all the chatter online recently about signalling when you’re uncomfortable about a subject matter in a game, I’ve always considered a character’s significant other to be off-limits. While players often grow attached to their characters and get very depressed if they die, players can invest quite a bit of emotion in this imaginary, perfect partner. It doesn’t have to go clinical for it to be one of the joys of playing in that game. Since RL is often far from perfect, and role-playing is fundamentally escapism, players can get emotionally attached to their in-game significant other. For that reason, I won’t ever put them in danger (let alone kill them). They can be the source of all kinds of hooks and motivations without threatening or degrading them.
    My two cents. Thanks for posting.


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